This article is going to focus on the Low Self-Esteem I once faced in my life that was brought on by another. I will let you in on the obstacles I faced and offer my suggestions on how you can raise your self-esteem. You may be able to relate or not, but understand that my focus here is the low self-esteem that was caused from another person and myself.

Approximately 3 years ago from today, my marriage came to an end; I am now a divorced single mother of a 4 yr old. Everything happens for a reason and I am happy as ever now than I was then; but it took some time for me to get to this point. I never knew what I was missing until my entire world caved in and I had to build it back up by myself from ground zero.

After my divorce, I slipped into a depression stage, what got me out of that was my son, I noticed that he started to sense and adapt to my depression (at the time he was only 1), that’s when I had to snap out of it, trust me its a lot easier said than done! After a few months went by, I realized that my ex-husband had truly killed my self-esteem, its not all his fault; I am at blame as well for allowing another human being to make me think and feel any less of myself. The following are some things that made me realize how low my self-esteem was:

• I didn’t feel beautiful inside and out
• I didn’t feel sexy at all
• I lost my confidence
• I became very insecure about my body/physical appearance
• I felt the need to seclude myself from social gatherings
• I was afraid of being judged negatively
• I felt that everything I did wasn’t good enough
• I had no friends
• I didn’t know what it felt like to be appreciated
• I didn’t know what it felt like to be complimented
• I didn’t believe that I would be good enough for anyone else
• I felt lonely
• I didn’t know how to accept others in my life
• I hated what I saw in the mirror

After I realized that I was in pretty bad shape emotionally, I gathered my inner strength and decided to get my life back, I didn’t have any friends that I could talk to or even hang out with. So this is what I did….

• I created a MySpace account (I know, lame huh, but it worked)
• I slowly reunited with old friends that I went to High School with
• I started to meet new people, which eventually turned into great online friends
• I noticed that I had people in my life now (not including family)
• I kept myself busy with my friends
• I began to focus on my son and myself
• I started to actually attend social gatherings
• I learned how to accept compliments from others
• I noticed that I began to smile a lot more
• I spent time with myself doing what I wanted to do
• I took a trip out of state and visited a family member
• I went to bed with a smile
• I woke up with a smile
• I began to notice what I had in my life rather than what I didn’t have
• I bought new things that made my son and myself happy
• I started to write anything that came to my mind whether it was happy or sad thoughts
• I learned how to block out the negative thoughts and focus on the positive
• I am today a much more optimistic person than I was then
• I learned how to accept another person wanting to do something nice for me

I know these probably seem like really tedious things to do and you may not believe that this will work because it’s a lot easier said than done, but believe me, this is what worked for me. Everyone is different and I understand if you can’t relate or see my perspective, but if you feel that you do have low-self esteem, my advice is to at least try it, what have you got to lose, right?