How can one define what a friendship really is? It’s very easy to call someone a friend, but is that person really a friend or a foe? Understand that my expression within this blog is strictly my opinion based on my personal experience, some may agree and some may not.

I am very particular when it comes to choosing friends; I have been betrayed, cheated on, taken advantage of and have been emotionally left alone a countless amount of times by others that I once claimed as my “FRIEND”.

Friendship is something I feel that everyone should learn how to cherish. A friend to me is someone who will always be there in my time of need, whether I just need to talk, vent, cry, ask an opinion, fetch constructive criticism, or even if I just need to be in his or her presence. I personally live each day by the old saying “do on to others as you would like done onto you”, with that being said, I give others my utmost respect which is exactly the way I would like to be treated. There has been an innumerable amount of occasions where I’ve had to literally put my life on a brief pause to be there for a friend(s), (which I absolutely did not mind, if you know me, you know that I will always help whenever and where ever I can), but the ridiculous part is when that time came for the favor to be returned, there wasn’t anyone available to put their life on a brief pause for me.  What does that tell you? Obviously the people I called my friend(s) were not as friendly as I anticipated. My resolution was simple, I’ve consciously made the decision to consider certain people that were once my friend(s) as just an acquaintance(s). I know it’s pretty sad to say that, but I would still like to have them in my life, I’ve just come to realize that I may have cherished “friendship” more than they have.

So now, I tend to carry the weight of most of my worries myself; I guess after being hurt so many times, you learn how to be your own best friend. Everything happens for a reason, all we can do is accept it and move on, it’s absolutely worthless to let emotions take over, nothing can ever be solved when negative emotions are running the show, sometimes its best to be analytical of every situation, this way the pros and cons will shine towards a more controlled resolution.

I know this may be so cliché but my true best friend has always been my mother; she did maintain her motherly role but never did cross the line to where I couldn’t trust her. My mother has always been there for me. She raised me to become the person I am today, a lot of my mental insights arise from her, she always told me the pros and cons of all situations I have ever presented to her, she never did tell me what to do, she made sure I knew the benefits and consequences of each scenario, she then took a step back and allowed me make my own decisions. Granted I didn’t always make the right decision, but she was always there to hold my hand through the difficult obstacles I conjured at times. The most important thing was that in her eyes, I can see that she never thought any less of me, I never felt judged by her, and that is honestly the best feeling in the world!

Other traits of a True Friend:

True friends are people you can tell anything and everything to and feel the security that it will not be repeated and no judgment will ever be placed on your character

True friends can agree to disagree

True friends can have civil arguments, reconcile and move on with no harsh grudges or crushed emotions that will follow into the future

True friends guide each other through minor and major life obstacles

By: Sharlene Le