Writing about infidelity is a very difficult topic for me only because I’ve been one of the chosen ones to have experienced this a few times that I’m aware of. It’s unfortunate but I’m experiencing the feeling of the past again and I can’t help but ask God, why? Why does this have to happen to me so many times, why is it that every man that I gave the world to, took me for granted? I have no tolerance for Infidelity and it’s wrong in so many ways you can’t imagine. A person intentionally takes the step by step into committing infidelity, they make that choice, they chose to share with someone else rather than their committed partner, it isn’t something that’s an accident, it’s something that is acted upon and is of the conscious mind.
I’m not quite sure where to begin, so I’ll just start typing and let this all flow out of my mind and into text. I feel betrayed, crippled at the heart, devastated and the daily anxiety is out of control. This is a feeling I won’t wish upon anyone, as I am in love with being in love, that infidelity isn’t something I would ever do to my partner because I strongly believe in respect and the do’s and don’ts of relationships. How is it that a man can be so madly in love with a woman, but yet cheat on her or do anything that would bring tears to her eyes? He knows what he has, he’s quite aware of the goodness of her heart, how she makes him feel, how much she understands him, how she’s never judged him or held his past against him, how she will go above and beyond for him, her confidence, her internal beauty, her independence….but yet, he makes the conscious choice to share his bed with another woman and risk losing his soul-mate forever. This is something I won’t ever be able to understand. The only reason that makes sense is that maybe or possibly all the things he’s ever told her is false…because when you think about it, if a man truly loves you with all his heart, he wouldn’t leave, he wouldn’t have the urge or curiosity to be with another, am I right? who knows…It could also be selfish traits, the selfishness of only thinking about themselves and not being considerate to the person they were involved with, (this is what infidelity does to a person’s mentality, it makes you second guess everything, as you can see here in my words, suddenly all that you believed in…seems as if it wasn’t real, or it didn’t exist)…It’s one thing to be lost and confused and need space, but it’s another to take that space and share it with another…It just isn’t right.
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